


Little Orphan Harry.

by Kingknome



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Government, Interview, Never say Potter, harry is just a pawn, not gonna ever edit this, terrible ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-01-02
Packaged: 2018-05-11 03:00:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5611357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kingknome/pseuds/Kingknome
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Dudley Dursley changes his father's ambition.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little Orphan Harry.

**Author's Note:**

> I rattled this off after work on the the bus home. Please excuse the lack of editing.

When Harry Potter was still small enough to stay inside his cupboard and young enough not to know better, the neighbors thought he only visited the Dursley family occasionally. As he got bigger, more curious, and began to fling himself out of the arms of his only family into Privet Drive, the Dursley family heavily implied to the neighbors that his real family had only just dropped him off for the day. The neighborhood would sigh about how the unfortunate Ms Potter should leave her good-for-nothing husband and come to Privet Drive; or better yet the not-too-near council housing. Then perhaps something could be done to contain her wild boy who was occasionally seen streaking through the front gardens. 

The Dursley family knew they couldn't keep up the charade forever, and knew eventually they would have to account for the boy somehow. They just didn't know how. If you you were able to aske them about it, they would have told you they were hoping for one of Liliy's many wizarding friends to come collect him. In the end, It was their unimaginative son Dudley who provided the answer. 

After a long boring day at work Vernon settled down next to his son on the sofa to catch the news. Dudley, thinking this was a very grown up activity, did his very best to copy his father. Within minutes Vernon was railing at the telly, mostly to express how incorrect members of parliament were, mostly with the refrain "Why, I could do better than that! My son could do better!" And Dudley, intent on copying his father yelled "I could do better than that! My Daday could do better!"

At the commercial break Dudley turned to his father and asked, "Why don't you do it daddy?"

Vernon thinks about his son's words the next day, rolling them around his mind like a fresh mint. He could do better. The parliament was full of imbeciles. It couldn't be much harder than managing a company like Grunnings. 

Slowly, as the boys in the Dursley household grew, so did Vernon's Idea. It grew until Vernon Dursley got up the guts and the effort to enter himself in the local primary elections. It grew until he had a small support staff made up of Perunia and her gossip of housewives. It grew until some one said to Vernon, "I'd vote for you, but really you don't stand out much... You need an issue that people will sink their teeth into; something that keeps them thinking about you."

Dudley had been enjoying his current favorite movie Little Orphan Annie over and over again cursory of the Dursley's new VCR. While it definitely wasn't Petunia's favorite film for him to watch, she tolerated it for Dudley's sake; it helped that there was no magic in the film, and it had a sufficiently terrifyingly orphanage for Harry to be threatened with. 

Vernon came home during the third showing of the film that day, and gracelessly switched the telly over to the news, over the screams of his son. But not before he listened to the character exclaim at their sudden good fortune and popularity after having adopted an orphan. In true Dursley style, Vernon took in the lesson that charity equals popularity, and the more pitiful, the better. 

So the Dursley household began to scheme how they could integrate their ungrateful nephew into their campaign. They used all the tools available to them, their neighbors, a few bribes, a death certificate with a few smudges over the year of death, and a few very public cancelations for a 'family emergency'. 

When Vernon Dursley skipped out on a press gathering of all the candidates, he was brushed off and forgotten by most. When he returned in a private interview a week later on the local news, it was the other candidates who faded into the background. 

\--  
Good evening, this is Ryan Lynn reporting to you from Surry. Tonight we have a special interview from one our local candidates in the up coming election, I'd like you all to welcome Mr Vernon Dursley. 

Hello Mr Lynn thank you so much for having me on the show tonight. 

Yes of course, Mr Dursley, we are all vary interested in in your campaign. As I understand you were unable to attend last week's debate do to a family emergency. And there were also rumors that you might drop off from the race?

Ah yes Mr Lynn, let me go ahead and clear this all up for the voters; last week as I was preparing for the debates we received a terrible phone call. My sister in law was tragically killed in a car accident along with her husband. 

I see mister Dursley, that must be very hard indeed. 

Yes it's still very raw for us. Luckily their son was staying overnight with us, otherwise he surly would have been killed as well. I hope the voters can excuse my absence, considering the circumstances. 

Oh Its very understandable, Will this continue to effect your campaign?

Yes Mr Lynn it absolutely will. Of course my first thought was to drop from the race entirely to attend to my nephew, but as we've learned about the circumstances surrounding the deaths of our inlaws I became determined to turn this country around. 

What sort circumstances are we talking about?

They were unfourtunetly killed by a driver under the influence; my brother in law

No! 

*nods glumly* indeed, it seem that without our knowing, our own family has become mixed up in the drugs and crime that plagues our country. My wife and I have long been deeply concerned for our nephew, but until now did not know how truly deplorable his circumstances were. We knew they were going through a hard time, but we didn't know they had been driven to living in their car like gypsies. If my little nephew had been with them he would be dead!

Such tragity Mr Dursley, I can see in you how it has really ignited a flame. What sort of reforms do you think could prevent this for another family in the future?

Well Mr Lynn, I have quite the list here...

\--  
Vernon Dursley won the election, and the Dursley's lived happily ever after. Including little orphan Harry Dursley.


End file.
